An Uncanny Ability
by LadyAlambiel
Summary: I finally conceded that my Kings would never truly grow up, or at least, they would never grow out of their uncanny ability to injure themselves in some of the most unexpected ways.


Disclaimer: I don't own Narnia or any characters you may recognize from the books or the movies, I wish I did but I don't... I also don't own the Narnian Calendar. It belongs to Elecktrum who was kind enough to let me borrow it for my story. Her own stories are awesome and you should go read them too.

Summary: I finally conceded that my Kings would never truly grow up, or at least, they would never grow out their uncanny ability to injure themselves in some of the most unexpected ways.

A/N: A oneshot requested, suggested, and egged on by WillowDryad. ;) Hope you like it. This is part of my _A Light in the Darkness_ universe. But, you can read it as a standalone. Enjoy!

**An Uncanny Ability**

ӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁ

I sighed as I closed yet another incident report involving the Kings injuring themselves and added it to the bottom drawer of the cabinet that held all the incident reports revolving around the Kings' varied ways of injuring themselves or each other over the past ten years. I was going to need to add an additional cabinet soon. I firmly believe that if not for Aslan's protection, those two colts would have ended up killing each other by accident with some of their stunts.

Opening the top drawer, I pulled out a file that concerned the first time I realized that Seventhdays could be just as dangerous as during training…

_"I'm going to knock you off like you deserve, you great lummox!" I frowned as I heard King Edmund threatening his brother, but there was a hint of laughter in his voice too. The guards in the hall were all looking nervously from me to the cracked door leading to one of the smaller libraries. Surely, though, their majesties could not already be attempting fratricide. _

_King Peter mocked his brother, "You? Come off it, Pevensie…oh wait, I think I'll just knock you off it."_

_I pushed the door open just in time to see my Kings balancing on the railing that ran around the balcony. They were laughing and grinning as they stood, hands wrapped around each other's arms. They were acting as though they were going to throw each other off the balcony. The High King leaned one way and the Just King leaned the other way. I moved closer to them, but didn't call out for fear of startling them into falling. Foolish colts._

_King Peter made to throw his brother toward the balcony (thank Aslan), but then it seemed to me that King Edmund's foot slipped as he attempted to stay on the railing, throwing them off balance. I leapt forward, but missed as the Kings fell with twin shouts. The balcony was not one that hung over the cliff, though, and I was relieved to see them moving from where they landed in the flowerbeds directly below us. _

_Alithia pronounced that the only harm to the Kings were bruises, scratches, and a sprained ankle each. However, the Kings had to apologize most profusely to the Nymphs tending the flowerbeds they'd crushed in their landing. They're serving in the garden in lieu of training for the rest of the month…or until Theia the Beech Nymph determines whether their help is beneficial or detrimental to the flowers._

I put the file back and pulled out a different file that was closer to the front of the drawer. If I had known then that crushed flowerbeds and sprained ankles were only the beginning, perhaps I would have assigned personal guards much sooner and in greater number. Although, the Kings seemed to be able to slip away from an entire castle full of guards with ease, so an increase in personal guards most likely would have made little difference. Somehow, my Kings managed to find danger even when they weren't balancing on balcony railings. There was the time they had gotten it into their heads that they could successfully ride a horse with King Peter standing on its back and King Edmund standing on his shoulders. And, they succeeded…until the horse moved. They emerged from that stunt with King Peter having a broken arm and King Edmund a broken leg. But, somehow they failed to learn their lesson as I discovered the next summer...

_It had been a warm pleasant day so the Four had gone for a picnic with the ambassadors from Archenland. I'd accompanied them as one of their guard, but was distracted when one of the young children decided to give me her sole attention. Dame Sepphora aided in distracting the child and taking her back to her parents but not before she laughed at me. She is still a cheeky little pest. _

_In the ensuing time, the Kings apparently slipped off to where the horses had been tethered. I finally spotted them galloping toward a rough high jump that I'd had built for their training session on the morrow. But, they had apparently attached the bridles together on two horses a piece and were shakily balancing with one foot on each horse. Those foolish colts were about to break their necks. _

_They approached the jump together. King Peter's horses leapt the jump, but he lost his balance and hit the ground hard and landed quite badly. King Edmund…King Edmund's horses stopped instead of jumping, flinging him over their heads and directly into the jump. The Queens and their ladies screamed in alarm even as I, Dame Sepphora, and other guards raced toward them. Fortunately, neither colt was dead. King Peter suffered a broken arm and dislocated shoulder, while King Edmund suffered a concussion, a broken arm, and a broken leg. _

I shook my head as I put the file away. What was worse was the fact that over half of these reports involved the Kings playing with weapons. I'd emphasized from the first time I trained them that weapons were to be respected and used with utmost care. I am certain (most of the time) that my Kings know that the weapons they use are not toys, but still they cannot seem to keep from playing with the weapons. One time, King Peter decided to keep Queen Lucy's dagger away from her and they end up tugging on it, but Queen Lucy abruptly let go when she lost her footing on the dewy grass and King Peter managed to impale himself in the shoulder with her dagger. Another time…oh I still couldn't determine where the idea came from, but another time King Edmund decided he was fast enough to snatch a thrown dagger out of the air before it hit him. King Peter threw the dagger and it pierced through King Edmund's palm, just missing key tendons that would have severely crippled his swordhand if they'd been cut. One of these days, I feared that the Kings would end up accidentally killing each other because they were playing with weapons instead of doing as they have been taught.

I had a meeting in one of the gardens and, as I stepped outside, I recalled that a few weeks ago I had teased my wife by telling her we should wait until our Kings have grown up before we have our own children. She'd merely rolled her eyes in response. However, considering the Kings were now twenty-three and twenty and both were…

I paused as the Kings staggered through the open gates, the High King leaning against his brother for support. Both were soaking wet and King Peter's face was bruised while King Edmund's clothes had been torn and he had a bloody nose. They stopped in front of me and twin guilty looks flashed across their faces. King Peter coughed, "We can explain, Oreius. We just went to go fishing this time, honest."

King Edmund nodded, "But, there was this Kelpie and-"

I held up my hand, cutting them off, before I sighed. "Go see the healers, then fill out a report. I have a meeting that I cannot miss, so we will discuss your explanation in the morn." Then I walked around them. I finally conceded that my Kings would never truly grow up, or at least, they would never grow out of their uncanny ability to injure themselves in some of the most unexpected ways. Oh Lion, if my wife and I waited to have children until the Kings grew up and stayed out of trouble, we wouldn't have children for at least a century.

ӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁӁ

**A/N: Please Read and Review! **


End file.
